I was gonna stay in bed all day and sleep the day away with Mike……as if this day seven years ago never happened. I then read a Facebook post my daughter Hannah wrote and decided i would write instead. I really do know by now that sticking your head in the sand does not really work LOL

Today seven years ago after noon i received the call that Mike had been shot. No other details given. This will be a short version. At the hospital I am told Mike was shot in the head and brain matter was coming out and that he would die….read the statistics on living after this, or having any kind of quality of life.

A lot has happened the last seven years. It has been a looonnngggg and difficult journey, and will continue to be. A road most can not relate to and I am honestly so thankful for that. I would never wish this life on anyone. I know it could be worse blah blah blah, but to us it has been devastating. Things were lost that can not be rebuilt, or bought again. This did not happen to our stuff. It happened to Mike’s body and mind. It has impacted those that love Mike and have been there mentally. I have literally wiped Mike’s brains off his face. Then watch my children in tears as I threw it in the trash can……they feared those could have been memories of them. So yeah, we have all been changed by this.

I could write on and on about the hardships, breakdowns, tears, challenges, even how so many leave you….but instead after seven years i am gonna share what I have learned through all this and continue to learn. It has taken me this long to accept this is “our new normal”. I finally own this journey, and i feel like Mike does too.

#1 God remains the same, God has unconditional love, God comforts, God heals, God provides, GOD NEVER LEAVES!!!!!!! Without Him I would not be here writing this morning. I 100% know I would be dead, or in a mental institution……BUT when i am weak that is when I am strong BECAUSE that is when we call on our heavenly Father and let Him take the wheel. There is no navigation system like my Jesus to lead and guide the way.

#2 You need your village…..no matter how small! I could not do what i have to do without Hannah, Noah, mom, and dad. They are the reason people have called me superwoman. Love them and hold them close. Your village will be your backbone when needed.

#3 I am loyal, I am faithful, I keep covenants, I Love big, I forgive big, I have an extreme amount of empathy, I am tough, I am strong, I am hard-headed, I am a problem solver, I know without a shadow of a doubt that God has me!

#4 MENTAL HEALTH MATTERS! In our situation there was never enough education or follow up on mental health. Talk to someone…a therapist, friend, pastor. Medications at times are needed. I grew up in a time wear you are supposed to pull yourself up by your boots straps and get going……or put on your big girl panties. I am here to tell you that tragedy changes your brain chemistry…..no boots or panties will help! Yes call on Jesus, but i believe the Lord gave us people that are smart and can provide help when we need it. So do not feel like medication is weakness. It is strong to realize you need some help and to get it……IT IS VITAL!

#5 DO NOT STOP LIVING! Life may look way different, but hold on to things you enjoy and love. Find ways to incorporate them. KEEP MOVING! KEEP DREAMING!

#6 Get healthy or stay healthy. Diet and exercise are truly a game changer in our physical and mental health. Do not neglect yourself in either.

#7 Life is still going to be full of different seasons. So get on that surf board and surf. A wave will inevitably knock you off the board. A storm will come and change the day….but guess what….we will feel the sun on our face again… we will see the rainbow….if we stop and take a look around us we will see how beautiful this life can still be! Look for love, peace, joy, and happiness in every day. DO NOT WAIT FOR SPECIAL OCCASIONS. We are not promised tomorrow so soak in that sunshine, gazing at the stars, that love from your pooch, the laughter and smiles from children, a meal with parents, that cup of coffee, that good book, that chat with a friend……all those little things we forget to thank Him for…those my friends are the big things.